Fulfilling Work

The other day I was asked how I choose my subject matter. That's a tricky question for me because I'm in the midst of actually changing the direction of my work. In the past I made work which I felt expressed the beauty that I saw in the natural world around me. My intent was to make glass a vehicle to reflect what I thought was beautiful. An idea which is not unlike a photographer taking a picture of a beautiful landscape. My glass was not as realistic and I thought of my images as more of "micro-landscapes", but the concept is similar. I then began to incorporate images which helped define my concept in a way that was more accessible and easy to understand. In other words, people like things which they can identify. It was fun making beautiful objects and I still do that on a much smaller, more marketable scale. I even enjoy doing larger commissions along the same lines. It is very rewarding to create an object of beauty and place it out in the world, hopefully making the world a more beautiful place. Not a bad way to make a living.

Yet, recently, I've been feeling empty inside. It's the same feeling when I was a teacher. I was doing something of value, something which I did enjoy and something which made a difference. But I still had a feeling of being unfulfilled. I wasn't answering my calling. Then last month, during a meeting with my mentor group, I realized what was wrong. My mentor challenged me to make sculpture. That may not sound like such a big deal given the fact that I already make three dimensional, fuctional objects. But the challenge was to make abstract art from a material that is traditionally used to make decorative things. It was a concept which I had given up on after I graduated from school and began teaching and trying to sell my work. I find abstract art to be very compelling and more interesting than representational art. I've just never given myself permission to go in that direction because I could not envision the marketing process. Representational art is easier to sell and I need to pay rent. Now I've been given permission to play. Better yet, I've been challenged to play. The source of my inspiration and subject matter is not the world around me, but the world inside me. The work is more personal and intimate in ways which my previous work could never achieve.

It's hard work to play this way. It takes a lot of time and it can be draining.  I'm constantly 'feeling' the work and the process is a rollercoaster of sometimes intense emotion. I know that I'm on the right track because my emotions are raw. It's hard to take sometimes.  I told the mentor group, (there is a group of ten artist in the program,) that I believe that good ideas and successful work don't just happen to artist. We have to earn them. We have to make things that fail and things that are ugly or wrong. Feelings of doubt, failure, fear and sometimes depression are a part of it. So is joy and sense of fulfillment with the understanding that you are truly answering your calling. Yes, it can be hard sometimes, but it is our task to make those 'wrong' things, those failures and to work our way though our fear and doubt.  Sure we might learn, but more importantly is that we recognize that it didn't work and  not take it personally and move on. Nothing great is achieved easily. For some reason a quote from F. Scott Fitzgerald seems appropriate, "Show me hero and I will write you a tragedy." I'm not sure if it’s that sad because when it works, there is little in this world that can be as satisfying….when you've earned it.

Fear and golf, how it might relate to art.

I love golf. I used to love fly fishing but since moving to San Diego, I haven't had as much opportunity to go out since there aren't any nearby rivers. I played golf before, but I really didn't like it much.  After my last bout with cancer, I took up the game with my trainer and I fell in love with everything about it. I'm not very good, but that doesn't matter as much as just enjoying the process of the game. I've been reading a book by Dr. Bob Rotella called, "The Golfer's Mind." It's about the psychology of golf, but you can easily change the words golf to life and it will be just as relevant. I was recently reading a chapter about fear and realized that one can say the same things about art. I'm going to repeat the chapter here, but change the words and you'll see what I mean.  Remember this is originally about golf.

"There are two sorts of fear; the genuine kind, and the kind you may sometimes feel when making art.

Let's suppose that you were walking with your child at the zoo and a pride of lions somehow  burst out of confinement and started running toward you and your child, looking hungry. You'd feel fear, the genuine kind, and you'd be right to dos. The fear reaction is one reason our distant ancestors on the African savanna managed to procreate before they became lion food. The passed this trait on to us.

Now let's suppose that you own the only art studio in the world and that you're the only one making art. No one would see your work. Would be ever be fearful when you made art?

You wouldn't of course. You'd have nothing to be frightened of. There are no hungry lions in your studio. So why, then, do some artists feel fear when they make art? In art, fear is usually rooted in the worries about what other people will think of you if you make something ugly or bad. Fear can also be evoked if you feel that your self or your identity is defined by making good art. But remember, fear of making art, (or maybe making bad art,)  is nothing more than a thought that you have chosen to entertain.

Art, at its core, is a social endeavor, and therefore it's inevitably associated with other people's opinions. Your art can evoke respect and admiration. It can persuade people that you have courage, that you are smart, talented and creative. Unfortunately, it can also persuade them that you're quite the opposite too.  In the end, the absolute worst thing that can happen to you is that you might make some bad art, you don't  hit the mark, you make something ugly, and someone says something behind your back or to your face. It's a blow to your ego and nothing more.

Tom Kite once told me his daughter's gymnastics school amazed him. Every time those girls worked out or performed, they risked an injury that could paralyze them. They had reason to fear. But they didn't. The risk was so great that it forced them to put it out of their minds and perform coolly. Maybe if art had that kind of risk, golfers would learn to be as clear minded.

But there really is no danger in making art. It that sense it's like basketball, and something Michael Jordan once said is relevant. "Fear is like a mirage. It's an idea you made up. It really doesn't exist."

If someone has a lot of fear about making art, it tells me that they are spending a lot of time away from their studio worrying about never being successful, worrying that they are working their tail off, putting in time and energy, and that they will never be rewarded. They are fearful that they are not destined to have great things happen to them.  (My God, this is me!!)

I repeat the point that if you’re going to think about making art, you got to think about making great art. You've got to ting about making art that really matters to you. It's okay to have occasional doubts, fears and worries. But you must not dwell on them. You've got to have the will and discipline to not allow yourself to brood about potential disaster, because the brain thinks that's what you want and that's what it's going to give you in the studio.

However, if your ever in the studio and a lion jumps out from behind a door and starts running toward you, you have my permission to be afraid. Fear will help you run faster."

Thank you Doc' Rotella.

Taken and paraphrased from "The Golfer's Mind: Play to Play Great"  by Dr. Robert Rotella.   ppgs.93-95.

The Raven Project

I wrote on my Face Book page back in March 2010:

"If you read my bio or talk to me about my work, you'll know that sculpture is my natural direction. Glass lends itself to be three dimensional, though I'be been know to create 2-D work as well. I've been making a lot of bowls this last year and I'm just about done. I need a new direction so I've started testing and making samples with the idea that I would become more sculptural with my work. With that said, I'm going to attach a a couple of photo galleries of work in progress. If you're familiar with glass, you'll see my technique, or lack thereof. If you're not a familiar with glass, hopefully you'll see something that interestes you. Either way, you'll witness the beginning, the middle and the end, be that glorious or appalling. "

Well, I've finally started investing the wax. It's kind of sad and very disappointing that it's taken me this long to get around to finishing.  I'm doing two ravens in black glass. This week I'll steam out the wax and hopefully start firing before I leave for the Bay Area next week. My hope is to show the world that I may be slow, but I'll do it. Check back here in a couple of weeks and see the results or follow me on Face Book at Rob Morey Kiln Formed Glass.

"Your Success is Our Success" was a Big Success!

At our last general meeting on June 19th at the San Diego Art Institute in Balboa Park, Kathleen Mitchel put together an amazing panel discussion titled "Your Success is Our Success".  The intent of this presentation was to help us grow and thrive as artists.  The panel consisted of Dana Springs and Vicki Reed from the San Diego Commission for Arts and Culture, April Game from SDFAS/Art Pulse and Sarah Trujillo from Quint Contemporary Art. Kathleen began the discussion with some prepared questions for the panel such as  advice for artists  approaching art professionals such as themselves, and what they look for when reviewing work. After the initial "ice breaker" questions were discussed, the floor was open to the members to ask the panel questions, which they did most enthusiastically.

I realize that for some, this may have felt a little out of their league. I fully appreciate that this wonderful community of glass artists which make up the AGA is very diverse in talent, technique, direction and intent of our work. I imagine that some at this meeting were thinking , "This isn't for me." Especially after experiencing some of the strong, upfront dialogue and advice which a few in the panel had to give. Others found the panel to be interesting and the overall meeting to be what was needed. This is probably most evident by the fact that no less than a dozen people have approached April Game with questions about her mentor program starting this fall. The beauty of our association is that it can and does try to meet the interest and needs of the group as a whole. If you were one of those who found the discussions of the panel not necessarily something which you would want to pursue or pertains to you, then that is a good thing. You know that probably dealing with public art directors and art dealers is not a direction for you. The fact is, it's not for everybody. For others, it was a great opportunity to meet some of the people in San Diego that are a part of a bigger art scene than the regular venue of local galleries and shows.

Over all, I found the meeting to be one of the most important events that the AGA has had since I've been a member. Not only did we all learn a lot, but having the esteemed panel take the time to discuss these issues with us and the patience to answer ALL of our questions, was a valuable experience for all of us as we pursue our goals to become more successful artists.

Thank you Kathleen for a job well done. Thank you San Diego Art Institute for hosting this event. And thank you to the esteemed panel, Dana Springs, Vicki Reed, April Game and Sarah Trujillo. Your generosity of time and information is truly appreciated.